He said "It's never goodbye, its only see you later"

Is it really?

The thing about moving on is that you don't really move on completely. At least not right away and sometimes even, never.

I only learned to ignore his presence and accept his absence.

I know one day, maybe soon, I will see him again. So I guess it's a "see you later" but it doesn't mean that I will fall back into an old habit. That's just what he was. An addiction that I had to get rid off. I might be seeing him later but there will be no relapse. I'm not closing my doors, not saying never, but right now, i feel like "goodbye" and i'll do what I can to keep it that way. He can and will break my heart and that's scary. He is bad for me.

I still miss him though. I miss talking to him.I didn't just lost me a lover but I lost me a friend. He didn't. I'm still his friend but he is no longer mine. He can trust me still, I know I can't trust him. I guess friendship can go one-way.

And I miss getting laid.

I like this whole idea of starting over. I like it that I am always given second, third and nth-time chances to make things right. I like the thought of me keeping my focus, knowing what I want and actually going out there and getting it.

I'm definitely wiser. Sometimes,it takes a major heartbreak to push me forward and gather up my pieces all together. It took one big blow to knock me back on my senses.

For the first time in years, i feel like there is something to look forward to. For the first time in years, I feel the ease and the calm and the happiness of being alone. I have peace and one day, I'll find love.

My life is what I make it.

Too little time too much to do. My mind is so off you.

I've been looking for this picture which I just can't find. I forgot where I saved it. School starts tomorrow. I'll be overly busy beginning then. I'm glad my schedule is arranged and I get Saturdays and Sundays off and I get Friday nights to spend with my friends. I'm excited. I've got a million things to do and buy but I'll try to squeeze all errands in the 2hour daily gap between work and my classes. Good thing there's a mall right in front of the school. I need to get my license. I'll take care of that next Friday.

Starting Over Yet Again

I've licked my wounds long enough. I've savored the pain and embraced the longing. I've moved forward. I got up before I completely imploded. I'm better.

And so I'm back.



The last letter was sent.
It said I miss you.
Everyday.
I still do.

The last letter was received.
It said love, live, laugh.
I hope that's what you are doing.
I can only wish you well.

The last goodbye was said.
Just in time.
My first love broke my heart.
For the last time.

Knowing is always better than not knowing.

Knowing is always better than not knowing.

I'm just liberated.

Thank you for setting me free. Now I can finally move on.

Thank you for the ride. I had fun. Some bumps were painful but you helped me move. I got somewhere one way or another. I moved and I learned and that's all that matters now really.