I never stopped caring. I just stopped showing it.

Yesterday your facebook status was about you being sick and I kinda wish I'm in the position to take care of you but given how you pushed me away, I had to pretend that I don't give a damn. But see, I give a damn. It matters to me how you are and though I am not that nice and I'm not a liar to say I wish you happiness and all the good fortune in life, I care enough to at least wish you well. You should really learn to take care of your body and well being cz all I've been reading about you is about you being sick, not feeling well, being cranky and mad about everything. You are one hell of a ball of negative energy.

Anyway, I'm not reading your updates because I'm snooping around but for some odd reasons, you are always on the Top Updates on Facebook and I don't wanna remove you cz you might think I'm bitter or a sour loser cz I'm not. Appearance is still important and honestly, I still wanna know how you are and I miss you ever so often and it's good to feel sometimes that you actually exist. But I swear, I don't snoop around. I don't even open your profile.

Okay...so hope you get well Jule Eric.HAHAHAH

On Getting Me Laid

The real challenge for a man is not to be able to open a woman's legs but for her to open her heart. Just because she sleeps with you doesn't mean she will again. Not even a sizzling performance can win you a repeat performance. Though sometimes it does but if you want a woman to be more than a guest star, it would take more than bedroom skills.

I'm not sure about other women but I'm speaking for myself. If a man wants to get me laid he needs to challenge my mind but if he wants to get me in bed for more than a taste-test, he have to make me feel good in and out of bed, he have to seek my soul or at least make me feel like he interested in my complications while continously seducing my mind.

I guess what men have to learn is that their penis' is not addictive. What's addictive is how he makes a woman feel good inside even when he is not inside her.

Repeat performances is when sex gets complicated so if you are not up to it or if you are not sure if you are up to it, you hit once and then you run. That's what you do. Don't ask for a second helpings. One bite should be enough because the next bite can be toxic.

Dreams Are My Reality

I'm declaring today a personal holiday so I'm skipping all classes this afternoon. I don't wanna see my Marketing and Finance teachers. they stress me out.

I have 3 major zits in my nose and I look like Rodolph. I never had a breakout like this since birth! I don't know what's wrong with my face now and why I've been having pimples so often now when I rarely get them before. Maybe I need to switch products or whatever.

Anyway, I'm sending off my brother today who just took the nursing board exam this weekend. He is going back to Bohol and relax for a bit before he start looking for a job here in Cebu. He seems nervous and as he would put it, "sad". Apparently he is not very happy and very confident about the exams but I told him it's out of his hands now so it's not a problem anymore. All he can do is wait for the result and pray pray pray.

Now that I think about it, I think I developed an allergic reaction to Jervis. I remember that after all the issues we've had in the last couple of years, each time I see him, I felt like having a fever and a sneezing fit and when I got close to him, I literally have rashes which lasted for days. Now that's what you call physical reaction. So maybe it's a good thing I haven't seen him for over a year now cz I really can't afford to be sick. The other night though, I dreamt of him. I can vaguely remember his face really. I thought I did me an imaginary partial lobotomy and deleted that picture. Except his eyes of course. Each time I look at Carys' eyes, I see his. Anyway, I dreamt of him and all I remember when I woke up was his face. He was right in front of me and his face was so near mine and his eyes were looking at me and I just stared at the face I used to memorize by heart. I wasn't sweating when I woke up and no heart pounding so it wasn't one of those chase-me dreams I usually have. I just saw his face.I don't know what it means but it feels weird. I feel funny because I dreamt of Jonas too. Why the hell would I dream of him! I don't even know him. hahaha!